We are two weeks from Christmas. Pastelle eating is underway, ham tasting a random and rare Christmas lime gas happened and indeed, if only for a few moments squeezed between the new Patrice and Kes tunes, the sounds of Christmas are about.

What’s not about? My Christmas tree.

Don’t get me wrong. I LOOOOVVVEEE my tree. I’ve collected Santa ornaments for years and have quite the collection. I love watching the lights of the tree dance on the clean floors and hell, I even have a Christmas scented Yankee candle, (Starlite Maraval has these)  that heralds the season by smelling up the house with Christmas tree scent. 

But this year I have a toddler ya understand! And I ain’t rushing to do no tree. 

I know someone is reading this and saying ‘nah mommy, ya have to put up a tree for Trini Christmas…: Revoke my Trini card then! Steups. Save me the ‘he will only touch it a few times before he gets bored’ bit, I know my truth. *stomps foot*. 

Actual pic of my small man removing ornaments from the tree at his school.
You see, I see the tree, with all its glory becoming yet another thing I will have to constantly bark no’ about when my son is around. Christmas or not, being the parent of a toddler changes you. Everything is dangerous to these curious, giggly and tantrum filled not quite two year old humans. Toddlers see everything as a touching and tasting opportunity. Parents spend these years filled with awe, fear and baby proofing work.  I love my snuggle bug but I hate who I have to become with constant ‘no, no, no, no, no’ statements and I just don’t intend for Christmas to unnecessarily add to the no list. 

And that list of ‘no’ is just too long. It includes:

– climbing on the couch

– climbing burglar proofing

– emptying cupboards

– climbing the stairs sans company

– opening the front, toilet, laundry and other doors

– licking the toilet

– Entering the toilet when mommy would just like to try to pee alone once in daylight hours (just once merciful Jesus) 

– pelting empty water vessels when vex/happy

– jumping on mommy, daddy and hell anyone that cares get to his level

– climbing out the playpen

– opening my eyes with his hands when I’m asleep

– picking up and drinking any vessel he sees including Bleach bottles which now live in a cupboard high off the ground

– randomly putting on his shoes (this was cute for like five minutes) then demanding via tantrum to head outside – even when bathed and dressed for bed

– grabbing all mobile phones and remotes to speak into them ‘hello?!’ 

– ripping off diapers to walk about in the buff

This is not a comprehensive list. 

Twenty months is a great time for weight loss and sore throats. Parents of toddlers say no a lot. It’s a great time for trees too.. If you don’t mind adding to the ‘no’ list.

Say Yes to Santa Story time with this great new local book about Santa from Jaimie Lee Loy

I’d like to say yes to my son more and there’s no better time than the holidays to say yes to reading storybooks (Jaimie Lee Loy has a wonderful new Trini one)  singing Christmas Carols (you can’t help but laugh when they say: Bah, bah, bah, bah instead of la, la, la, LA) and to opening presents at the right time. I plan to say yes to garland today. There will be some high up Christmas in the house this year I promise. 

So I’ll out up the tree, but not now. I’m enjoying the season with my child and trying to find more yes times. Will I do my tree? Maybe. Christmas eve is looking good…

What’s your advice for the Christmas tree with toddlers? Come on, comment, you know you want to…